“It’s a nurse eat nurse world out there”
said shaky Doctor Green,
“And you’d drink and smoke as much as me
if you’d seen just what I’ve seen.
“It was in the hall just yesterday,
such a gritty, gory sight,
it was the messy residue
of a hungry nurse-fight.
“And then last week, Lola Bean,
the nurse from pediatrics,
was making a grizzly midday snack
out of the new phlebotomist Patrick.
“I know you don’t believe me
But they gnaw you down to the bone.
I tried to call the police ten times
but those nurses broke my phone!
“I rarely leave my office these days
I’ve boobytrapped the door
I always hear that pitter-pat
of their sneakers on the floor.
“So if you see a hungry nurse
just steer clear out of their way
And meanwhile I’ll think up a plan
to break us out one day.”